Mon Tulfo and Me

Mr. Buencamino writes political commentary for Action for Economic Reforms. This article was published in Business Mirror, December 14, 2005 edition, p. A11.


I confess I have a split personality. I am part-Mon Tulfo. So far, I have kept him under control. However, the other day, as I was collecting the administration’s reactions to the Senate investigation on wire-tapping, my Mon broke out and took over.

All of a sudden, he was typing annotations to the statements I had gathered. I tried to stop him, but he pointed his finger at me and ordered “Isumbong mo kay Tulfo.”   To make a long story short, he scared me, so I did.

The following quotes were lifted almost verbatim from various dailies.  Don’t expect me to give individual citations for each.

  • ”AFP Chief Senga admitted no case had been filed against Doble nor was he being subjected to a military investigation. ‘The investigation of Sgt. Doble is being undertaken by the (PNP-Criminal Investigation and Detection Group which is part of the Philippine National Police. I have no idea what’s going on with the CIDG,’ Senga said.”
  • “Senga’s declaration was in complete opposition to his statements on Nov. 23 when he claimed the ISAFP agent was facing an administrative case and was being investigated by his mother unit.”

Mon’s annotation: General, sinungaling ka na dinagdagan mo pa ng katangahan! You have an intelligence unit accused of going out of control and you haven’t lifted a finger? By-pass lang ang gamot sa iyo. Senate by-pass, hindi yung heart by-pass na sabi ni Bert Gonzalez kailangan daw niya.

  • ”AFP Public Information Office (PIO) chief Col. Tristan Kison said. ‘He who alleges should prove. With all these allegations, the proper venue is the court.’”
  • ” Asked if Santos would be in a position to file a case in court, Kison said ‘Again, the court will decide on that. These are all allegations. As I’ve said, the proper venue is the courts. They have to prove it in court. The proper venue is the courts.’”

Mon’s annotation : Isa ka pa. Pag-uumpugin ko yang mga ulo ninyo ng Chief of Staff mo para matauhan kayo. Tarantado ka pala.

  • “Presidential Spokesman Ignacio Bunye said the President herself is not even bothered by allegations that she was bugged by a key intelligence agency of the government.”

Mon’s annotation : Gago! Commander in Chief yang amo mo! She was bugged by her subordinates, tapos wala siyang pakialam? Ano kayo mga ulol?

  • “Asked if Malacañang plans to verify the matter, Bunye said ‘The bottom line for our President is the question whether she won the election or not…And our answer to that is the President won the election.’”

Mon’s annotation: Pare, iniiba mo naman ang usapan. The Senate is investigating a breach of security and the role of the military, if any, in the last election. Magpakalalake ka, harapin mo ang paratang sa inyo tungkol sa panggugulo at paggamit sa ISAFP noong nakaraang election. Bakla!

  • “Cebu Rep. Antonio Cuenco and Leyte Rep. Eduardo Veloso issued a joint statement, branding Santos as a ‘recycled witness’ and saying her testimonies before the Senate were ‘full of inconsistencies.’  Veloso noted Santos’ claims that she was free to roam the ISAFP premises, particularly pointing to the ‘blue room’ that was supposedly off-limits to people without prior clearance.”

”’It’s unbelievable that the AFP or ISAFP would be so lax in security especially in the light of persistent terror threats. Besides, the nature of ISAFP work, which is about intelligence networking and information gathering, is highly sensitive,’ the Leyte lawmaker said.”
Mon’s annotation: Congressman, kaya nga tinatanong ng Senado si Senga kung bakit hindi niya pina-imbestigahan ang ISAFP. Dugay ka na sa Kongreso tonto ka pa guihapon!

  • “Romulo Macalintal, Arroyo’s election lawyer, said the Senate should not drag the military into the political arena, ‘Bahala na ang Senado. Patunayan nila ang gusto nilang patunayan. Madaling magsalita, mahirap magpatunay. Huwag nang guluhin sana ang sitwasyon, pati ang AFP,’ he said.”

Mon’s annotation : ‘Panyero, ang gusto kasi malaman ng Senado ay kung nanggulo at nakialam nga ang ISAFP.  Magulo na nga ang usapan guguluhin mo pa. Talagang abogago ka nga!

In closing, allow me to paraphrase the famous words of Mike Defensor, “It’s my keyboard but I was not the one annotating. My personality was spliced, altered and enhanced.”   And, to my monolingual readers, learn Pilipino so you can read my Mon’s annotations.

Mon’s final annotation: Pare-parehong gago kayong lahat.

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